Reddit Writing Prompt #29: A Totally Normal Interview For A Totally Normal Job

Wizardry is as common and as professional as businessmen in today’s society. Write about everyday life. – Venerable

The wizened old man peered down his knobbly nose at the piece of paper set on the only clear area on his desk. “So, Madame Delacourte, I must admit, I am very impressed with your resume,” he said, fingers combing his long beard. He stopped as he discovered a small mouse that had become trapped in the long white hair at some point, and carefully untangled the small creature without looking away from the young woman sitting across from him.

“Thank you, sir,” said the stocky young woman. She wearing a dress suit that slowly shifted colors, with buttons that glowed like small stars.

“Tell me,” said the old man as he finally freed the mouse from his beard. “Why should Merlinex hire you? What sets you apart from other applicants?”

Stacey Delacourte stayed smiling as Archibald Magnifus tossed the small mouse towards the cage in the corner of the room. As quick as lightning, a long tongue speared out from the toad-like creature sitting inside, and the mouse vanished. The toad-thing let out a satisfied belch. “Well, as you can see from my resume, I graduated from Harvard magna cum laude with a degree in arcane sciences, and I spent a few years after graduation apprenticing to freelance sorcerers, and I can produce a recommendation letter from Madame Le Fay, Master Crowley, and Master Gates, if necessary. I’ve also volunteered with People for the Ethical Treatment of Dragons, the Centaur’s Alliance, and spent six months learning herbalism from a Somali witchdoctor. I have experience with numerous arcane disciplines, and I believe that my wide breadth of knowledge will be a boon to Merlinex.”

Archibald Magnifus hummed in thought. “Where do you see yourself in five years?” he asked.

Stacey closed her eyes, and let out a slow breath. When she opened her eyes again, they were filled with a pure white light that forced Archibald to avert his eyes. Stacey’s mouth moved in ways that the human mouth was not built for as she spoke in arcane tongues that shook the windows with their volume. Archibald’s beard began to rise as if there was a static charge in the room, and he waited for her to finish her divination.

At last, the light faded, and Archibald’s beard returned to its former position. “I see myself asking that same question to a promising young wizard who wants the position that I’m interviewing for right now, sir,” she reported.

“Very good,” Archibald smiled. “Welcome aboard.”

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One thought on “Reddit Writing Prompt #29: A Totally Normal Interview For A Totally Normal Job

  1. Wow, Stephen, these are certainly different from the last batch of stories! They,re both so light and funny. No blood and gore, nothing creepy, just good fun. How versatile you are! I thoroughly enjoyed both of these and love some of the little details like the toad mouse trap. Also really like both endings….very clever. As always, thank you for sending them.      Sorry to have missed your call this morning. I was out on a walk all through Guilford. Pop-pop said all was well with you and that you start your new internship tomorrow. Hope you’ll enjoy it. Lotsa love, Oma

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